Arti Lirik - A Very Twiztid Christmas

Alright, so let me get this right, you say it’s a motherfucker who come to your house…


To your muthafucking house


And he ain’t be trying to rob you?


Ah hell no, that’s Santa Dawg, you ain’t ever heard of Santa?


Nuh uh


Santa Claus, Saint Nick?


Nah


Kris Kringle?


Man nah!


You ain’t ever heard of Kris Kringle?


Man Hell nah!!


Look (What?), he come down the chimney in some spots, but some people they ain’t got no chimney, so he just come in tha back dooor, he may have to kick it in though, depending it what hood he in, cause some people be bolting they shit


Who?


You know Kwee-Kwee and them down on west 7 mile, you know, be slinging the herb.


Fool, I know who that is, who you talking about kicking in some DOORS?


Santa, SANTA CLAUS!…Ho Ho Ho everybody’s Jolly


Oh, you mean the motherfucker who be ringing the bell down in front of Churches’ Chicken


Something like that, except he come and he be bringing gifts, it’s like religious thing or something


Man, you acting like a sucker believing in that Fishtishish Bullshit!


Man, I don’t even like fish! so, LOOK!


WHAT?


He’s looking at his list


Right


He’s checking it twice


Right, Right


And he gonna know who’s naughty or nice


Man, hell nah, so what you saying, this motherfucker work for the FBI? he got a list, what kind of list?


I mean, it’s kinda like that,it ain’t really a list like that,I mean its Christmas list, you know like gifts and stuff… remember when you was and you wanting Space Invaders for the 5200 back in ’86? (yea), and then nobody got it for you? (uh huh), cause you wasn’t right, Santa was like Fuck that, I ain’t bringing him shit, I’mah gonna bring my homie Lil Poot erythang.


Well fuck SANTA, and fuck you


Man fuck you man, you don’t be dissing no Santa Claus, dawg


I don’t be beliving in that shit, that shit ain’t even real, man you acting like a little sucker beliving in some old Santa Claus shit


Man, SANTA for life fool


*have you been a good boy this year? if not I’m gonna split your fucking head!”


With so much Drama in the D-E-T

It’s kinda hard putting trimin’s on my Christmas Tree

But, I some how, some way

Keep coming up with fresh ass tinsel just to drizzle on the way

May I, wrap another gift, so that I, can sneek up in your house in the bedroom

Everybody tripping, roasting chestnuts, waiting on Santa to come

I got Blaze in the living room drinking Egg-Nog

Jamie’s in the kitchen and he’s rollin the bomb

I got Little Eric Loder dressed up like a Elf

And, all they keep saying is “go fuck yourself”

So, turn off the lights and close the doors

Man for what? Santa Claus Hoe

And, we gonna blow ounce with him

G’s up, hoes down, I got Santa Claus high as shit


Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog.

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog.

With my Mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind

Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog

With my mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind


Mixing Egg-Nog and Gin

Everybody got their cups but they ain’t chiped in

Well i called up Blaze told him, cop a dime

He said him and Anybody coming through at nine

See everything is fine, cause I’m feeling all Christmassy

And I’m standing right next to the Christmas tree

Seeing the blinking lights made me sick

But I always decorate every year for Saint Nick

So, there ain’t no chance he gonna pass me up

Got some Cocoa in a cup and some Hydro in a blunt

That I am gonna smoke with Santa Claus

Get him all shit-faced till the break of dawn

And, watch him fly off in the night

Hey thanks for the presents, I hope you make it home alright

Before he left he said “Hey, Listen Bro”

“Your the first stop i made, i gotta billion more to go”.


Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog.

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog.

With my Mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind

Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog

With my mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind


Later on Christmas Day

My homie Violent J

Came through with a gift for me

And a dope ass fruit cake “aight dawg,”

With a phat ass joint with blue cots

that make ya choke, with some bud, ain’t no joke

Had to take a step back, sit my Egg-Nog down, knocking Rum and cot

I’m fucked up now, but ain’t no body clap, the presents are wrapped

Shaggy’s style through with a 40 in a sac “roll it up”

Smoke with Santa, break with the elves

They supposed to stop by at a half past twelve


Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog.

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog.

With my Mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind

Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog

With my mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind


Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog.

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog.

With my Mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind

Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog

Waiting on Christmas gifts….Egg-Nog

With my mind on my presents

And my presents on my mind


Shit If I would of known we was getting shit for free

I would have pulled my dick out!